Things are going well. I go to PT twice a week. Though I am still tired all the time, (more of a general malaise, really) my stamina is improving dramatically. I can cook dinner, do the dishes and bake bread in the same afternoon without breaking into a cold sweat and passing out from exhaustion, so that's nice. I'm getting back to normal. I can also sit at my desk, hunched over my computer screen, in a decidedly "hip unfriendly" position for hours on end. As that is basically what I'm paid to do, that too is good.
I slept terribly last night though. Couldn't get comfortable. Tossed and turned. Very weird. I did have a particularily difficult PT session earlier that day, so maybe that was it.
Oh, and I am sooooooooo over the crutches.
But yes, I am still forcing myself to use them, as ordered.
I have been drifting in and out of a post-surgical funk lately. I think I am just bored and frustrated and tired of the limitations. I was telling my PT guy how funny we humans are. Three months ago I was so sore, all of the time. I could barely walk. Now, my pain level is at zero and all I can do is think back on those "glory days" when i could walk without crutches. Sure, I was in abject and profound pain, but BY GOD, I WAS CRUTCH FREE!
Does nothing ever satisfy us? We are so impatient as a species, so quick to forget the reality of the situation and substitute one of our own making, one which will always leave us deeply dissappointed. What a self fullfilling prophecy we are. Our natures work against us.
Remember that when you are still on crutches at week 11+ and can't remember why. It might help you. It did for me.